Cat's Meow

Ever wonder what cats are saying when they meow? Do they really understand us when we talk to them? They probably do they just act as if they don't because cats are wonderful at ignoring humans, until of course it's time for for food or they need loving. Hmm sounds like a damn man doesn't it? Anyway, that was wrong of me because men have nowhere near the sophistication of cats! Alright I'm not going to deviate from the real question here which is: what the hell are cats saying when they meow?

Let me tell you what I think my cat is saying when she's meowing. Let's start with the mid morning meow when it's gotten blazing hot outside and it's only 11am. I go out on the porch and call, "Where's my kitty?" She comes crawling out of the bushes under the porch like she's on her last leg , her meows sounding like she's reading her own obituary. "Damn bitch, I've been getting my ass beat all night by gangsta' wildlife. I'm tired, and starving thanks to the cheapo responsible for buying groceries in the house. What does he think cats only eat once a day? At this point she has crawled to the top of the steps and is poised at the front door waiting for me to open it. She gives me her look that says, "Be about your duties please!", and yawns as if I'm boring her. The nerve! Well, I suppose I appropiately named her Goddess for that very reason. Royalty in another life I suppose eh?

I'm sure you've all wondered about what your cats were really saying to you, if you could translate, of course. Maybe in the end it just boils down to us having that connection with our feline friends whether it's feeding time or playing or maybe even cuddling, either way it's a language that goes without saying. Like the time Goddess peed all over my other half's clothes. I bet she was trying to warn me back then. Now that I think about it- damn I should have taken that as a sign!